Funny found in my e-mail

I have a Labrador retriever. I was buying a large bag of Purina at
Wal-Mart
and was in line to check out. A woman behind me asked if I had a dog?
Rather than doing the "here's your sign" thing ala Bill Engvall, I told
her
"No, I'm starting The Purina Diet again."
I went on to say that I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the
hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an
intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and
IVs in
both arms.
I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that
it
works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat
one
or two every time you feel hungry and since the food is nutritionally
complete, I was going to try it again.
I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now
enthralled with my story, particularly a tall, guy who was behind her.
Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog
food
poisoned me.  I told her no; I'd been sitting in the street licking my
balls
when I got hit by a car.
I thought the guy was going to need help as he staggered to the door
bent
over with laughter.

Hat tip to kim keep em coming